As you can probably tell from my lack of blog posts, the prep and training for this meet was the hardest I've ever gone through. I went through some major life changes right around the start of this training cycle, which I've written about in previous posts. I wasn't always focused on my training and a lot of the time I just got it done to do it. My diet was completely out of control-moving to the city and out of my parents house meant a lot of nights of "I'll just eat whatever I have" and throwing shit together. I rarely cooked actual meals and I was ordering out a lot. I gained about 8 pounds, which made this weight cut incredibly hard. Yes, some of that weight was lean mass and yes I do feel like I have put on muscle but still. I felt awful for most of this cycle and as a result had more bad workouts than good. My back was at its worst and I had some health issues that made me lose a week or so right in the middle of my program. I couldn't afford to make it up, I just had to skip those weeks and move on. Did I go into this meet feeling confident? Somewhat. I was confident in my squat and bench, but had zero confidence in my deadlift. I've written before that I never allow myself to miss deadlifts in competition.....well this time I did and it made me feel absolutely awful.
The Weight Cut
I compete in the 114 weight class, but my "regular" weight during training usually sits somewhere between 116-118. I usually only have to drop 2-4 pounds to make weight. Since I knew I was up higher (in the 120-122 range) at the start of this training cycle, I decided to start dieting down about 6 weeks out. This basically meant cleaning up my diet and stopped drinking alcohol. Around Halloween I had some stomach issues and could only eat bland foods for about a week. If you don't know, bland foods is just a fancy phrase for empty carbs. I was bloated, weak, and felt awful. As soon as I felt better, I got back to dieting and cutting. After 4 weeks, I had only lost 3 pounds and was stuck at around 119. I thought I wasn't going to make weight and I was so confused as to why I wasn't losing anything. I did everything the same as I have in the past-being aware of macros, avoiding processed foods, preparing all my meals...not to mention spending a shitload of money on food twice a week. I basically had to skip Thanksgiving, which was the hardest part of this prep. One week out, I was still at 118. I decided to do water loading as well as cut all carbs and dairy the week of my meet. I used Caitlyn Trout's water loading protocol via an article she wrote which can be found here. Basically all I ate all week were eggs, chicken, and broccoli. Luckily it paid off and I weighed in at a light 113 pounds. HOWEVER-lesson learned. As soon as Christmas is over (come on, give me a break I missed Thanksgiving) I'm going to keep my diet clean as much as I possibly can to avoid having to do this again. Definitely the hardest weight cut I've ever done and yes, I do think it affected my performance.
The Meet
Let's start out by saying I had very high goals for myself for this meet and I hold myself to a very high standard. My goals were 200 squat, 105 bench, and 250 deadlift and AT LEAST a 500 total. I went 5/9 with 180-95-195 and a 470 total. Squat and bench were meet PRs, but my deadlift was absolutely embarrassing. The week of the meet my left hip flexors seized up to the point where I couldn't even walk. I had an emergency chiropractic session before I left on Thursday to release them, which did help a lot. Then sitting in a car for SEVEN hours (seriously, LI traffic can suck it) made them tense up again but after stretching and rolling they felt better. I felt pretty good after rehydrating and eating on Friday. The morning of the meet I felt normal again, just a little nervous as always. My squats felt pretty good during warm-ups and I crushed my 170 opener. I took 180 next and got a little stuck at the top but pushed through to get it. I've hit 190 in the gym, so I assumed that's what I would be going for next (coach was calling all my weights, which was awesome. I didn't have to worry about it), but I took 185 as my third, got stuck halfway up and couldn't push through. Miss. I was upset, but 180 is a 5lb meet PR. Not a huge PR but still a PR! Bench came next, which also felt great during warmups. I took 90 as my opener-already a 5lb meet PR-and got it easy. 95 was next. I didn't set-up correctly and ended up touching too high on my chest then not being able to push it all t he way up. I missed it, so had to take it as my third attempt. Luckily I got it, for a 10lb meet PR. While this is still a really awesome accomplishment, I really wanted 105 or at least 100 on bench. I was feeling a little upset over this but had to push it out of my mind to focus on deadlift. In training, my deadlift has not been going well. I had a lot of back issues that have been fixed, but I lost a lot of strength due to that. I haven't been able to hit anything over 185 in training since the summer. So I wasn't expecting a miracle, but I was hoping that meet adrenaline paired with my own personal desire would help a little. Warm-ups actually felt pretty good. I could feel my hip flexors a little as I got heavier but I just ignored that. I was taking 195 as my opener-a weight I hadn't hit in months. Missed it. I was in shock. I couldn't believe I had missed my OPENER. How embarrassing. I came back and easily hit it as my second attempt, but at this point I now needed 225 to total 500. We decided to go for it. The bar didn't move at all. I was upset, embarrassed, shocked-I was ending with a 470 total, down 25 pounds from my last total (which was 495) and equal to a total I hit over a year ago. I should be improving, not moving backwards! John knew I was clearly upset and said to just focus on the accomplishments. I had 2 meet PRs, which is great. I knew deadlifts weren't going to be good. I just expected more from myself. The Soaring Eagle award was a surprise-so much so that I almost cried when John announced that I had won it! It really put things into perspective for me. Yes, I had a lot of rough patches while training for this meet, but I still showed up and worked my hardest. There will be others and I will do better in the future. Now I'm more motivated than ever to hit-and surpass-my goals. Videos if bench and deadlift are below, unfortunately I don't have any squat videos :(
The Future
Before I plan on doing any more events, I need to see a doctor about the hernia in my stomach. After bench was done, it was killing me on Saturday. Maybe this had something to do with my dismal deadlifting performance, maybe it didn't, but I need to figure out what's going on with that. I was planning on doing the Ithaca meet in March, but I might not be able to now. I would really like to do a local meet. I've never done a meet in Boston, I always travel to them. I do think this affects my performance because traveling is very taxing on the body. I also want people to be there for me. This may sound stupid but having no one at the meet with me was tough. I made friends, of course, but its not the same as having your loved ones there supporting you. When I travel, its hard for them to come. I'm lucky enough that my parents have been to a couple, but no one came with me this time and I was pretty lonely. Doing a local meet would mean my family and friends could be there to support me. I think that would also help them better understand why I love doing this. I'm also hoping to reach out to a few people in Boston to see about training with them-even once a month would help. The environment in which you train really makes a difference. I've noticed this both times I've trained at Cortland. Having someone there to push you helps so much and I don't have that. I train by myself and as much as I love being an independent woman in the gym, it really sucks sometimes! So if anyone in the Boston area is reading this....I'm on the hunt for a training partner! :)
I've set new goals for myself, and I can't wait to get back into training. I'm more determined than ever to get to where I want to be. Shoutout to John Gaglione for everything you've done for me so far and for being there for me this past weekend! Congrats on another successful event! Can't wait for the next one!!
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Stay STRONG and Stay FIERCE!!
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